The Trillion Dollar Twitterpation Two Step
© 2009 Michael Swickard, Ph.D.
There is rampant twitterpation in Congress. Our leaders are intoxicated by the adrenaline rush of spending trillions of dollars at a time. They live to give, using their time in office in a non-stop frenzy of giving from the national slop bucket to their political supporters back home.
Their press releases are almost always about giving a million to this worthy project and a million to that. It is slow work a million here and a million there. Sometimes they even get to joyfully give a billion.
Suddenly they were part of giving a trillion dollars at a time; not just once but several times. Of course the same old problem exists: officially, not one American leader has any plans of repaying the money so at some point the national debt will be defaulted.
Like drug junkies, they cannot think long-term. All they know is the high they get from giving trillions of dollars. Their short-term plan is to just “print” money with nothing backing it. Everyone knows to not take a check from a drug junkie; soon, the rest of the world will realize our money is not backed by anything causing a financial heart attack in our country.
All of this trillion dollar twitterpation makes me think of what happens to some Jackrabbits here in New Mexico when they become hooked by adrenaline. Despite off-color remarks about Jackrabbits and their proclivity to reproduce, I have it on good authority that the life of a Jackrabbit in general is rather boring. They stand droop shouldered and take a bite of grass. They chew it slowly, looking left and right. Boring. Occasionally they hear coyotes howling, but the truth is their daily life is boring.
A few Jackrabbits, though, become adrenaline junkies. Usually it happens completely by accident the first time they get that adrenaline rush. One taste of adrenaline and they are hooked. They cannot help themselves. They wait at the side of a road and at the last second they dash in front of a car either making it to safety by inches or not.
Many people wonder with literately minutes of no cars on a highway why a Jackrabbit would dash right into the path of their car. The answer is Jackrabbit adrenaline. If they get hooked on the adrenaline rush, it is not “if” they will get run over, only “when.”
What does this have to do with our leaders getting hooked on spending money they do not have any intention of paying back? In the last nine months our national leaders have gotten hooked on the adrenaline rush of spending trillions of dollars. The first time just nine months ago it was a little less than a trillion but they were twitterpated to the max at the power they had to pass thousands of special earmark projects. Like Jackrabbits they only think of the rush they get, not the eventual consequence which will descend upon them suddenly.
With the unbridled power of spending such astronomical sums of money comes a feeling of importance beyond their wildest dreams. They can now take over the banking industry and the American auto industry. In short, spending trillions of dollars makes them rulers of the universe, at least the Washington, D.C. universe.
Some thinking of the loss of prestige ask, “How can I go back to just spending millions?” When the thrill of spending a trillion dollars at a pop hits their brains they cannot go back anymore than a Jackrabbit can simply hop away from the road and back into stultifying boredom.
So our leaders stand, metaphorically, at the edge of the road and dash in front of the oncoming traffic, mindless of the potential disaster. Their twitterpation two step will at some point lead to a loud screeching of tires and then Bump Bump. The only problem is that we citizens will also be under the wheels.
Michael’s email is: michael@swickard.com